regasssa | The About Damn Time Pairings, Kinks and Squicks List

So I figured it was about damn time I had a pairings, kinks and squicks list for reference, especially with the upcoming season of fests, and at the end of October my birthday; so although it's potentially a few days late, I reckon writing this all up completely is the best way to go; that way if people are thinking about writing such and such, and they want to check up that I don't hate it without actually giving it away to me, then they can just run by this reference list. I expect to have to add to/change it as time goes on, and I expect people to write to me and say 'Oi, scumbag! You lied on your thing, you said you hated X, and actually, you like this story, which was so perfect that it made you forget how awful X was after all.'

So without further ado, my lists of pairings, kinks and squicks (in easy read lists, and then into grossly over the top explanation)

Pairings

Favourites
Snape/Harry (OTP)
Draco/Harry
Lucius/Harry
Snape/Regulus
Sirius/Regulus
Tom/Harry

Other slash pairings
Snape/Draco
Snape/Lucius
Draco/Ron
Draco/Neville
Harry/Ron
Sirius/Snape
Twins/Harry
Peter/Harry
Fenrir/Remus
Fenrir/Harry
Fenrir/Draco
Albus Dumbledore/Elphias Doge
Albus Dumbledore/Gelert Grindelwald
Salazar Slytherin/Godric Gryffindor
Voldemort/Tom Riddle
Remus/Snape
Lucius/Draco
Remus/Sirius
Remus/Harry
Sirius/James
Remus/James
Twins
Oliver/Harry
Flint/Harry
Founders/Draco or Snape or Tom or Harry
Tom/Draco
Teddy/Harry
Fenrir/Teddy
Scorpius/Harry
Scorpius/Draco
Albus Severus/Scorpius
Albus Severus/Draco
Albus Severus/Snape
James jr./Scorpius
Teddy/Scorpius

Het pairings
Bellatrix/Harry
Bellatrix/Draco
Draco/Ginny
Tom/Ginny
Bellatrix/Snape
Bellatrix/Sirius
Bellatrix/Regulus
Bellatrix/Teddy
Hermione/Draco
Hermione/Snape
Voldemort/Bellatrix
Voldemort/Hermione
Lucius/Hermione

Femslash
Bellatrix/Hermione

Non-Harry Potter pairings
Doctor Who - The Doctor/The Master
Hannibal - Hannibal/Clarice Starling or Hannibal/Will Graham
Red Dwarf - Ace Rimmer/Arnold Rimmer or Arnold Rimmer/Dave Lister
Due South - Either Ray/Benton Fraser
Star Wars - Qui-Gon/Obi-Wan, Dooku/Qui-Gon, Dooku/Obi-Wan, Obi-Wan/Anakin, Han Solo/Lando Calrissian, Luke or Dark!Luke/Han Solo

Kinks

Darkfic (although most darkfic may involve one or more of the below)
Bondage (Light/Medium/Hard)
D/s (or powerplay, if both characters are trying for the top spot)
Light S/M
UST
Mindfuck (not literally, thanks)
Deathfic
Alternature Universe (What if?)
Non-Con
Dub-Con
Hurt/Comfort
Angst
Post-War
Love/Hate
Plot
Characterisation
Canon
Clever inclusion of all of Deathly Hallows
Timeturners
Katoptronophilia (mirror fetish)
Cosplay (leatherplay/chainmail/restraints etc.)
Unhappy endings
Clever endings
Fulfilling a character's fantasies, sexual or otherwise
Role play (i.e. Harry pretending to be a student again for Snape)
Masturbation or Mutual masturbation
Voyeurism
Massage
Exposure
Delayed orgasm
Edgeplay (light)
Sensation play
Sensory deprivation (blindfolds/spells etc.)
Hauntings
Teacher/student
Blackmail
Because sex hurts/means something/changes things
One/both characters are virgins
Oral sex
Frotting
Exploration of difference sexual positions/places
Dependence/co-dependence
Threesomes or more (depending on the characters involved)
Odd fetishes - i.e. a parseltongue fetish, or a tickling fetish, but don't overdo it
Memories

Squicks

Plot? What plot? - Although I've surmised quite intensely the things I like in fic, none of these things actually have to involve sex of any kind. I like plot, ust, foreplay and mind fucking well enough to throw actual sex out the window if need be.
Lack of imagination when it comes to positions/body parts
Fluff - I just don't like it, can't help it. That's why Sirius/Remus is in little letters, even though I would love a nice Dark!Sirius/Remus
Dirty words - I don't want Snape/Lucius to say 'fuck', 'wanker' or 'cunt', it's just not in character.
Food play - there's nothing that puts you off going to family outings quite as much as imagining what you read last night; besides, food is sticky and unpleasant
Impact play - not including slapping insert character here across the face; it just doesn't appeal to me)
Strong s/m - up until a point is fine with me, but I prefer mental torture for my playthings
Alternate Reality - Where the only resemblance to canon characters is that they share the same name
Muggleification - Snape doesn't drink brandy, he drinks elfmade wine. That's not to say that Harry has to drink butterbeer all the time either; make something up. I don't want to see him at the Hog's Head drinking Guiness though, and I don't want to see Draco smoking and listening to Muggle rock music. Equally, I like my pureblood wizarding characters to wear robes, and not Muggle clothes. Keep the references to your personal life out of it, if Harry is humming along to Avril Lavigne, I'll be hunting you down and shooting you.
Fluids - too many of these, or making consumption/use into the focus of the scene. This includes blood/saliva/come...just urgh.
Male pregnancy (MPreg) - speaks for itself I reckon
Enforced pregnancies
Sex while pregnant
Exclusion of important facts in canon for the sake of plot (i.e. Sirius is conveniently not-dead, unless it is clearly an AU)
Bad grammar/spelling. Please check your story for LOSE and LOOSE and THEY'RE THEIR and THERE! These are the only ones that really throw me off. If you have trouble remembering which is which, so help you...but think 'Moose'. If you spelt it with one 'o' you'd laugh at yourself later.
Bad dialogue/making your characters sound like they've leapt fully made out of a Mills and Boon novel.
Scat/faeces - ick
Vanilla sex - If it's just shoved in sidewards to make them do it, it isn't important enough to the plot and shouldn't be there
Animal cosplay/roleplay
Beastiality
Chan - It has to be a really special story to make me even vaguely interested, and I prefer my characters to be of a consenting age, even if they're not giving it. See UK standards.
Alcoholism/drug usage - just not into it.
Extreme euphemisms - "His gravitationally challenged sex object" would qualify.
"And it was all a dream"/ Deus Ex Machina - one of my fandoms frequently does this to me...

As in Mock the Week; Scenes we'd like to see - these scenarios do not have to be immediate; for instance a Voldemort wins scenario could be subjected to next generation characters, or brought back for Harry to fight several decades in the future.
Voldemort wins
Dark!Lord Harry or Slytherin!Harry
Voldemort loses or there is a coup, and another takes his place
Voldemort loses and Harry's part in it is not believed
Voldemort loses but the Ministry is a greater threat
The school is taken over by Death Eaters
Insert character here is being unfaithful
Insert character here has his own harem
Insert character here is forced to prostitution
Forced marriage/bonding (possibly Dumbledore's, see below, or a part of a Voldemort wins/loses scenario)
Dumbledore has laid plans of dubious consent/a trap into which two characters fall
A quest brings two characters together
It's the end of the world, so lets have one last thing before we die
Marooned together (also imprisoned together/going on a long journey/holidaying etc.)
One character must seek learning/help from another, be it Harry or Draco after Occlumency lessons, or Grindelwald after one of Dumbledore's incredible secrets or even Snape needing Harry to talk to snakes for him.
Both characters are teachers
One character is an Auror who (has been caught by the enemy/is being blackmailed/has caught the enemy)

Can't for the life of me think of any more right now, so this is likely to continue to be added to.

The About Damn Time Pairings, Kinks and Squicks List

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